Taboo (AKA my Hawaiian vacation with the Brady's)

As promised, an account of my vacation to Hawaii with the Brady Bunch. To read about our (mine and the Brady's) Grand Canyon vacation, click here.

Many of you may remember the time the Brady Bunch went to Hawaii. You probably remember that Mr. Brady had to go there for work, and his company agreed to fly his whole family there on the company dime - including Alice! You may also remember that once they got there, Bobby found a little tiki figure on a construction site, and it turned out to be "taboo," meaning, bad luck. Bobby, Peter, Greg, and Alice all wore it and each time they did, something bad happened to them.

Greg wiped out while in a surfing competition, Peter woke up to find a tarantula on his chest, Alice threw her back out while hula-ing, and all three Brady boys were held hostage by a crazy professor who thought they were stealing his treasures.

What you don't know is that I had something to do with all of this so called bad luck. See, after we went to the Grand Canyon, I assumed I'd be invited along on their Hawaiian vacation as well, and my feelings were quite hurt when I heard about it from Sam the Butcher instead.

So, I plotted my revenge. I went to Hawaii, planted the tiki, made sure it was passed around, and watched as the havoc ensued.

Remember when Bobby gave Greg the tiki? I was there.

"Oh no! Does anyone see Greg!?" I was there.

"My back went out!" I was there.

"Get it off me!" I was there. (And yet somehow, they didn't see me?)

When they returned the tiki to the cave where they were held hostage by the man I hired? I watched it all go down. And I laughed. A lot.

I do feel kind of bad about how things happened. I mean, they seem like a nice family. But I'm sure they can forgive me. If there's one thing I know about Mr. Brady, it's that it doesn't matter how you cross him, he will forgive you. (If he can forgive the old prospector, he can forgive me.) But just in case, I have the most adorable dog I'd like to give them as a peace offering. His name is Tiger. I'll keep you updated.

All's well that ends well.