I like crushes. This is no secret to you guys, I'm sure. I'm kind of a flirt, I like men, and I get crushes from time to time. I've even blogged about my love of crushes in the past. What I don't love is when a crush passes over into the "feelings" zone without any warning. I like when things happen in the natural order:
1. Girl meets boy
2. They go on a date
3. Crush forms
4. They get to know each other
5. Feelings develop
When things go in that order, it's awesome and exciting. What I don't like is when I think I just have an innocent crush, but realize I'm actually (unexpectedly) experiencing "feelings." I'm walking along, thinking everything's under control, then suddenly I think about a guy and my heart starts racing with lovey dovey feelings? Um, not cool!
It's kind of exciting, but it's mostly really scary. Here's an illustration:
One of the last times this happened to me, that's exactly what it felt like. Powerless. Luckily, the guy did something kinda jerky the next day and the feelings/crush balloon deflated, bringing me safely back to earth.
Do any of you single readers feel this way?
No lectures on how I need to get over this if I ever want to get married, please. Condescending comments will make me raise my fist to the computer in rage and mutter under my breath which just makes me look like a crazy person. And that's not good for anyone.
(Nor is it moving me any closer to marriage, let's be honest.)
Note: Because a couple people asked, I wrote my distinction between a crush and feelings in the comments section. Please feel free to add how you would define them if you are interested!
Note: Because a couple people asked, I wrote my distinction between a crush and feelings in the comments section. Please feel free to add how you would define them if you are interested!
14 comments:
I TOTALLY feel this way!! Your illustrations captured it so perfectly! :) Oh, feelings. Sigh. And I don't think you need to get over it - embrace the fear! Revel in it! Then blog about it!!! ;)
I'm still not sure how crushes and feelings are different. Define a crush for me, Lady Elizabeth (all read in the Jane Austin reading voice).
A crush is when someone catches your eye and you think, "hey, maybe I'd like to date him!" But there's no real attachment. Crushes are often fleeting.
Feelings are when you think, "Oh crap, maybe I NEED to date him." And you feel more attached and vulnerable.
Oh man, I can't tell you how many times this has happened to me. I fall in love really easily. The worst is when the guy you like keeps popping your balloon and patching it up again. So you're up and down and up and down. And before you know it, you have a REALLY bad headache because your ears need to pop. Boys...
Simply Kate
Wish I had a solution. I still experience it with my husband. He does something great, he does something stupid. But most of all, since I was married my feet have been firmly on the floor but a happy heart. The best love for me quickens my pace and puts me at peace. No lack of control. It just feels like home.
I am so sad about the balloon dying in your illustration. It was my favorite drawn ballon ever. I am not a single reader (um, you know that) but I've had many crushes and for me they are torture. I define it as something you don't have and will never be. I still have one from kindergarten. I don't have true feelings for her but I will always remember her as my first "crush".
"He did something jerky." Ha!!
I won't tell you to get over it.
A crush needs to be there before "feelings" can grow...doesn't it. And every guy who evokes "feelings" can't be marriage-able - can he?
The facial expressions of the cartoon figures are unreal by the way
I know you can't mean unreal as in "unrealistic." That's some of my best art work you're talking about! hahaha
I like the flying cyclops... What do you mean 'unrealistic facial expressions'? Keep drawing. I LOVE IT!
I meant unreal as in ridiculously good ;)
Your drawing are the best! They really make me laugh. Crushes are a real high. It's the reality afterward that can be a bummer.
This is a good way to put it!
Unless a guy flat out DOES things like put his arm around me, kiss me, or tell me he likes me... I'm not going to say a peep.. because I'm a scaredy cat. So jumping to talking about feelings will make me think about it more and it's scary!
Ugh, feelings. I'm always so guarded that by the time I form feelings for a guy, they have usually gotten over their feelings for me and don't like me anymore.
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