Wednesday Thoughts

We're already at the end of June, which means summer is a third of the way over. As you know, I love summer, so I really don't want to waste any of it. Time to assess where I'm at, summer wise.

So far this summer I've:

• Become addicted to bomb pops (I had four yesterday and was afraid my lips had permanently turned blue.)
• Gone to two Tigers games
• Been to Amococo (see pictures below)
• Played frisbee
• Gone swimming several times
• Gone to an olde timey baseball game at Greenfield Village
• Seen two fireworks displays
• Ridden my bike into the ground
• Saved a turtle
• Saw the New Kids on the Block and Backstreet Boys
• Been to Lake Michigan & Ludington

Goals for the rest of the summer:

• Go back to Ludington several more times and swim in Lake Michigan
• Ween myself off of bomb pops (sad face)
• See Strange fruit at the Ann Arbor summer festival. I saw them once a long time ago and they really were strange (but oddly, I saw no fruit.)
• Go the the Fourth of July celebration at Greenfield Village
• Attend the Ann Arbor Art Fair, even though I have a love/hate relationship with it
• Either go to the Grand Canyon or buy season 3 of the Brady Bunch and watch the three episodes where the Brady's go there, and live vicariously through them. (Though quite frankly, I'm tired of living vicariously through the Brady Bunch.)
• Attend a BBQ
• Go to Cedar Point (in the works)
• Survive a camping trip (you know how I feel about this)

...and so much more! What have you done this summer? What do you still want to do?

Happy Wednesday.

Peep Show - Diorama Style

You may remember this from previous years, but every year my family does a Peep diorama competition. This year I decided to base mine on the viral video "Bed intruder" from the Autotune the News guys. I've always had a moral conflict laughing at this video, so please don't judge me. Admittedly, the topic isn't funny at all, but the autotune guys made it quite a phenomenon last summer!

In case you haven't seen the video, here it is:

In case you were wondering, I didn't win.

Happy Easter!

Wednesday Thoughts

You know what's scarier than the Grudge? Flirting. I mean, flirting for real - when you want a guy to ask you out. Not just playful flirting, purposeful flirting - do you know what I mean? Ok, I somehow just made it sound even scarier. And weird.

I've realized lately that most of the guys I've dated have been willing to meet me more than half way. I made this scale to illustrate. The red and pink lines are as far as I typically go with flirting, confidence, and boldness. The guy has to meet me the rest of the way which is something like 70% from the looks of it. I realize this isn't fair, but I'm not sure how to make the pink and red lines stretch further. How bold can I really be? How can I increase my confidence? Maybe I'm selling myself short - maybe I do more than I think I do. It's just that I see some girls who meet the guys more than half way, and I really can't do that.

Paint comes through again. Nothing but the best for you guys.


What about you? Are you/were you a flirt? As you know, I don't (can't) ask a guy out, so I try to be as friendly as possible to make up for it. How much do guys expect girls to do to express interest?

Enough about that. I have a confession about Halloween. You guys know I love Halloween so this might surprise you, but I don't like dressing up. I can never come up with any costumes, and I usually just feel silly. So then I just end up sticking with one of the old stand by's, like a cat, or a witch, or the thing I'm going to be this year which I can't reveal yet. But which is not original. What are you going to be?

One last thing for today - this Friday is going to be the last "would you rather" for a couple weeks. Instead of doing it every Friday, I'm going to move it to every other. This one is going to be Halloween themed, so get ready to make a very spooky decision. You're gonna love it! Come back Friday and see.

Happy Wednesday.

Things I want to do this Halloween season...

I will not be making this. It scares me.

Make some mod podge pumpkins. If I actually do this, it will be a miracle. A Halloween miracle.

Watch The Changeling, Ghost Busters, and at least one other scary movie (haven't decided which yet). Oh, and at least one t.v. Halloween special.

Decide who to have a crush on this fall.

Eat candy corns. Side note: when I was growing up there was an attorney named "Larry Corn" who had some really cheesy commercials on t.v. As kids we thought it was hilarious to call candy corns "Larry Corns" and in my mind I still call them that.

Come up with a really good Halloween costume. Or not. I could go either way on this one.

Carve a pumpkin into something unexpected.

Put the past in the past. Fall is my most nostalgic time of year, for better or worse.

Find the Disney movie, "Mr. Boogedy" on dvd - or vhs, I'm not picky - and hope it's as good as I remember it. Know it's not going to be, and watch it anyway.

Tell me what you hope to do this season!

Wednesday Thoughts

I am so excited about this weekend. I love the Fourth of July! Partly for patriotic reasons and partly because of fireworks, bbqs, days off of work, and the three day weekend we have coming up. And plus, I mean, I love America and stuff.

I have plans to see two firework shows this weekend - one over Lake Michigan, one over another lake. I can't wait. But to be honest, I sort of have mixed emotions about seeing fireworks. The nice part is you get to lay on a blanket outside at night with friends, watching the sky light up in beautiful patterns. The downside is the traffic, shrapnel falling from the sky, and mosquitoes.

Just this past weekend I went to a fireworks show and the mosquitoes almost took me down. I combated them by putting on some socks I had in my car and this was the result:


So not hot. Luckily it was so dark no one could see my (un)sexy footwear. I'll be better prepared this weekend.

Ok, here's a little 4th of July question for you. In the spirit of the summer's biggest weekend for bbq's, which do you like better: mustard or ketchup? I asked this question of my family when we were together for Father's Day and all the men preferred ketchup while all the women preferred mustard. Heather wasn't there to break the tie so it left me thinking that condiment preference might be gender related. Weigh in!

Happy Wednesday!

Single Awareness Day

Let me preface this by saying that I have no delusions about being in a relationship. I know relationships have their challenges and are not always pure bliss. I'm not trying to say in this post that single life stinks and relationships are perfect. Single life can be fun at times, and being in a relationship can have it's challenges.

Now that I have the disclaimer out of the way, let's move on.

As I have previously said, I like Valentine's Day. To me it's more about love in general than being in a relationship. But I've heard many friends call it "single awareness day" and I have to agree that as a single person Valentine's day sort of puts a capital S on single.

In honor of Single Awareness day, I thought I'd make a list of things that are not fun to do alone. I hope I don't sound bitter in this post (because I'm not) and I promise to end on a happy note. So without further ado, here's my list of things that stink to do alone!

Going to the movies - I did this once. I saw Harry Potter alone. All my friends had already seen it and I thought I was strong enough to go alone. I hated it. If you have ever done this successfully you'll have to let me know your secret. I knew a woman once who went to a movie alone and even though the theater was practically empty, a weird man came and sat in the seat right next to her. Not cool creepy guy, not cool.

Going out to eat - I actually do this from time to time and don't really mind it but I have several single friends who hate doing this and I guess I understand why.

Going on vacation - I've heard of people doing this but I don't know how it's done. Do you hang out with people you meet while on vacation, or do you just spend all your time alone? I don't get it and I don't like the sounds of it.

Staying in and watching a movie - Some things are just better done with a significant other, let's face it. I have two Snuggies and it's not right that one of them is available to be wadded up and used as a pillow while I'm wearing the other one.

Playing board games/cards/uno (I find it ironic that a game called Uno can't be played alone but that's neither here nor there) - I played Monopoly by myself once and still lost. I swear I can't win that game to save my life.

Going to weddings/receptions/parties - I hate going to weddings by myself but at the same time I don't want to ask a date because I'm afraid he'll think I'm trying to give him some kind of subliminal message "marry me.... you want to marry me..." simply because I invited him to a wedding. Well, that and that fact that I sometimes whisper that on wedding dates. It hasn't worked yet but it will. Oh, it will.

Wow, that was creepy.

Ok, to even it out, here are things that are fun to do as a single person:

Watch Lifetime movie marathons

Read People magazine while eating a bowl of ice cream

Change your hair color without even thinking about if someone else will like it or not

Crush on every guy you meet

Wear both Snuggies at once

Not worry about doing something super special for your significant other on Valentine's Day
Buy yourself a heart shaped box of chocolates and eat them all

Am I missing any? (On either list?)

P.S. Thank you anonymous commenter, for the flowers. They are beautiful.

Wednesday Thoughts

As a single person, I am morally obligated to be against Valentine's Day. If I admit that I like Valentine's Day, I'm betraying my kind. But secretly, I kind of like it. I like walking into Target and seeing red and pink everywhere. I like thinking about things I love too. True, I don't have that one special person to love but I'm not bitter (please read that sentence in the most sarcastic "I actually am bitter" voice you can think of).

Saying the word "bitter" triggered the irritable part of my brain so I need to voice (pen?) a quick complaint, if you don't mind. I have been really stressed out about doppelganger week on Facebook. I have no doppelganger. And I don't dare ask people, "what famous person do you think I look like?" because what if they say Danny DeVito or something like that? Some things are better to not know (see previous post for more on that). The one famous person I have ever been told I look like is Angelica from the Rugrats. I don't see the resemblance, but I suppose it could be worse.

Will you indulge me in some very girlish stuff for a second here? It won't take long. Guys, you can tune out if you want, although I'd like to hear your opinions too. I'll make this quick. I want to change my hair color but I'm not sure what to do. I've been highlight/low lighting it forever and want a change. I asked my hairstylist what color my natural color is (because I have no idea) and she said it's medium blond with a tiny bit of red. But in the winter it looks darker than that. Boring.

So I went to one of those "see what you'd like like with a different hair color" websites and this is what I found. I was supposed to take a picture of myself head-on with my hair pulled back but really didn't feel like doing that. So all of these pictures show this dang rogue curl coming down my shoulder. Try to ignore that. Here are the results:

Any opinions? Oh, and if you were wondering, that's my nephew on my lap. Poor little guy probably wishes he had nothing to do with this post. I can relate.

Happy Wednesday.

P.S. Happy birthday, Mom!

New Year's Resolutions

Some of you may remember these New Year's Resolutions I made on my blog last year. But don't feel bad if you don't remember because I didn't.

1. Don't miss an episode of Lost. Yes. Easy. Was there any doubt I could keep this one?
2. Eat at least one meal a day. It was hard, but I managed.
3. Laugh really really hard at Seinfeld reruns. Moops! (That's Seinfeld for yes)
4. Hug my nieces and nephews three times (minimum) per visit. It was hard, but I managed.
5. Use more italics in this blog. I made a concerted effort with this one, and I have to say, I succeeded.

Wednesday Thoughts

At the beginning of a vacation, I always make a little to-do list so I don't waste all my vacation relaxing and enjoying myself. (That would be a tragedy, right?)

Anyway, this vacation I decided to get all that horrid stuff done early so I could fully enjoy the rest of the break. The number one thing on my list? Sort tons of papers/junk mail/who-knows-what and file it or shred it. That is my least favorite thing to do and I was dreading it. So, I decided to combine it with the Lifetime "Dirty Little Secrets Saturday" marathon. While sorting, I watched "My Mother's Secret" but came in about an hour late and couldn't for the life of me figure out what the secret was. It was frustrating but I stuck it out till the end. Then I watched part of "My Daughter's Secret" which was very boring (the secret was that her boyfriend got her involved in a bank robbery - big whoop!!). I almost started watching "The Nanny's Secret" but decided I'd had my fill of Lifetime movies and secrets for the day.

But the good thing is, I got the horrible task done. A few other boring things had to be done (cleaning and the like) then I was able to fully give in to vacation!

Here are some of the things I've done so far:

1. Played many rounds of Yahtzee. Found out I was born to play Yahtzee. I got three Yahtzee's in one round. My secret is that I'm just really skilled.
2. I have taken naps at 7pm on two different days then stayed up really late reading because I couldn't sleep.

3. Read to my niece till she fell asleep on my lap.

4. Got killed at Monopoly by an 11 year old. I would have won if that game wasn't based on pure luck. Unlike Yahtzee.

5. Declared on a daily basis that I will start my diet again tomorrow.

6. Nearly forgot about my blog but checked it occasionally to see if anyone had posted a new post on it. I hadn't.

I hope your week has been as fruitful as mine! Happy Wednesday!

Wednesday Thoughts

I want to start today by thanking those of you who have sent me Christmas cards this year. I especially love the cards that come with letters containing highlights from the year. I've thought about doing something like that, but I think the tone of my letter would be wrong for the season. Especially because the first line in my Christmas letter rough draft is, "This year I successfully continued my descent into madness*."

I kid. But really, what would a Christmas letter from me contain? Maybe a couple dating stories, a list of my favorite tv shows from the year, something about the monotony of my day to day life, and maybe to conclude, a word search or something like that just so you don't get too bored. Oddly enough, as I think back on this year, pickle flavored popcorn stands out as a highlight. Maybe I'd add a scratch and sniff to the letter so you could get the full effect.

What do you think? I'll start planning for 2010's card.

In other news, have you heard about this adorable cat in Japan named Maru? Let me start out by saying I am completely indifferent to cats in general, but this website won me over. Something about the combination of poorly translated Japanese and a surprisingly entertaining cat are making this cat's blog something of an addiction for me currently. Here's a link. Trust me, you have to have a heart of stone not to think this cat is adorable. I should know.

One more day of work then I'm off till the new year! Happy Wednesday! And Merry Christmas!

* editors note: I wrote this post in the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep. If it sounds a little loopy, that's why.

Christmas quotes

Four more days! Enough time to hurry and watch all your favorite Christmas movies before the big day. These are the movies we quote all year, but only watch once a year. Here are some quotes from some of my favorites. Feel free to add yours if you'd like.

The nerve of those Whos. Inviting me down there - on such short notice! Even if I wanted to go my schedule wouldn't allow it. 4:00, wallow in self pity; 4:30, stare into the abyss; 5:00, solve world hunger, tell no one; 5:30, jazzercize; 6:30, dinner with me - I can't cancel that again; 7:00, wrestle with my self-loathing... I'm booked. Of course, if I bump the loathing to 9, I could still be done in time to lay in bed, stare at the ceiling and slip slowly into madness. But what would I wear? - The Grinch

Clark: Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?
Eddie: Naw, I'm doing just fine, Clark.
- Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

It's just nice to meet another human that shares my affinity for elf culture. & one more from the same movie: Why don't you just say it? I'm the worst toy-maker in the world. I'm a Cotton-Headed Ninnymuggins! - Elf

This house is so full of people it makes me sick. When I grow up and get married, I'm living alone. - Home alone

Charlie Brown: Thanks for the Christmas card, Violet.
Violet: I didn't send you a Christmas card.
C. B. Don't you know sarcasm when you hear it?

This makes two quote based posts in a row - I promise the next will be back to normal. Although maybe it's nice to have a break from my voice? Don't answer that.

Wednesday Thoughts

I've been home, sick, for the last couple days and it's surprising how being sick just sucks away your creativity. (I'm trying to warn you that I have nothing funny to say so if you stop reading now, I'll understand.)

A couple weeks ago I saw seasons one and two of Full House on sale for $14.99 (for both) and decided it was too good a deal to pass up. Today I was glad I did; Full House is the perfect sick day TV show. Nothing like gentle comedy to get you through a day where you're only half alert.

I am starting to really look forward to the holidays coming up! I love Thanksgiving and Christmas. The only bad thing about the holidays is that they make a single person feel even more single than usual. Have you noticed that? I am going to try not to focus on that aspect of them though, and just enjoy myself.

Every year on Thanksgiving my family holds a gingerbread house making competition, as I've mentioned previously. I'm trying to come up with a cool plan for mine this year but I can't over do it, as too much pre-planning is frowned upon by the judges (AKA my family). Do you make a gingerbread house this time of year?

Confession: I'm seeing New Moon with a group of girls (women) Friday night and I bought the tickets online weeks ago. As I was ordering them, I had a bit of an identity crisis along the lines of "who am I? Am I the kind of person who orders Twilight tickets three weeks before the movie? How old am I?" I concluded that it was Sarah's fault (just kidding, Sarah!). But I really am looking forward to the phenomena of seeing a Twilight movie on opening weekend - more for the audience reaction than for the movie itself. It's gonna be a trip. I saw the first Twilight movie in a crowded theater and was beyond entertained by the giggles, the gasps, and the shouts of "I LOVE YOU!" (I couldn't hold it in) at the movie screen. I expect no less this time.

Happy Wednesday guys - I hope your day was better than mine!

Wednesday Thoughts

With the weather getting cold and the leaves changing colors, I'm finding myself in the mood to watch Ghostbusters. Remember that scene with the ghost librarian? Terrifying. (The rest of the movie, not so much.) It's sad how as you get older, movies that scared you as a kid are no longer scary. Another movie in that "used to be scary"category: Watcher in the Woods. Remember that one? NAREK!! (That's a reference to one of the "scariest" parts of the movie, in case you haven't seen it.)

This has been quite a week. I got my oil changed and found out five things need to be replaced in my car. I got a jury duty summons in the mail. My phone broke. My earring broke, etc.. etc...

But lots of good things have happened too, so I'm trying to focus on those. Don't worry, I'm not too gloomy - I'm sure things will pick up as the week goes on.

Moving back to what I was saying at the beginning of this post, I am definitely in the fall/Halloween spirit. I feel like watching a movie that's scary, but not too scary. Any suggestions? I caught something called "Mostly Ghostly" on the Disney channel and watched about five minutes before getting spooked and changing the channel. So keep that in mind when making recommendations.

How are you getting into the fall/Halloween spirit? Happy Wednesday.

Wednesday Thoughts

I think I've gotten myself in too deep with sewing. I started a new pattern today - it's the first time I've really followed a pattern - and I truly have no idea what I'm doing. I spent two hours cutting out all the fabric, then I just stared back and forth between it and the pattern for a long long time until I had to walk away, bewildered. I've been occassionally glancing over at it, but it intimidates me and I haven't had the nerve to approach it again yet.

I almost skipped writing Wednesday Thoughts today, but I skipped it last week and didn't want to get out of the habit. Truth is, I've been feeling a little blah these last couple Wednesdays. I'm not sure what it is. I'm sure I'll snap out of it. Usually I enjoy Wednesdays. Maybe it has something to do with the change in seasons - it's a mystery.

One thing I have been thinking about lately that I will share with you: I've been trying to come up with a good Halloween costume. The last couple years I have had a really hard time choosing a costume. I've asked my nieces and nephews for ideas but they always have the same suggestion: "a pwincess."

I was talking about this with a friend the other day and she told me that her mom always dressed her in crazy costumes when she was a kid, including one Halloween when her mom dressed her as an OB/GYN. She was about seven or eight, dressed in a doctor's costume, carrying around a naked baby doll the whole night. She had no idea what an OB/GYN was.

I want to come oup with something creative like that, but maybe without the "ew" factor. I've thought about being Doc from Back to the Future on occassion, but I'm not sure I want to be something ugly (no offense, Doc). Although I would like the excuse to say things like, "1.21 gigawatts!" And "Great scott!" for a whole evening. Halloween's the one night of the year I can get away with saying those things without people looking at me like I'm a crazy person.

What was your best costume ever?

Happy Wednesday.

Labor Day Dancer

Last year on Labor Day, while swimming in Lake Michigan at the Ludington state park, we were graced with a very special surprise: the beach dancer. This man danced with wild abandon seemingly oblivious to the social norms that most of us hold to. People stared, some laughed, some were embarrassed or annoyed - he hardly seemed to notice. His only rule seemed to be this: dance what you feel and don't hold back. He danced up and down the beach - he danced with wild abandon. I've never seen anything like it.

Even though I've been to the state park beach in Ludington many times since, I haven't seen the beach dancer since. I concluded that he must just dance around coastlines, never dancing the same one twice. I eventually forgot about him.

It seems however, that the beach dancer only graces people with his presence on Labor Day weekend. Maybe it's an end of summer ritual? We were thrilled this weekend to see this lovable goofball back on the beach, dancing his heart out.

But that's not all. In this short video, there's a pretty funny surprise. I won't ruin it by telling you what it is. Enjoy! (Oh, and you might want to turn down the volume - it's a bit windy. ) Katherine pointed out that this video just doesn't showcase his dancing well enough, so I posted one more video, below.

Monday!

The only reason I'm posting today is because I'm so sick of looking at that flag/eagle picture from my previous post! Not that I'm not patriotic, don't get me wrong. I'm as patriotic as the next guy. In fact, I'm the one who started the "U.S.A.! U.S.A.!" chant at both bbqs I went to on Saturday.

Speaking of which, did you guys have a good Fourth of July weekend? I had a really good one - busy but good. Here are the highlights (in case you care, which I assume you do since you're reading this):

*Fireworks Friday night in Manchester! Katherine and I organized a big group and we had a blast. During the fireworks, Brian kept us laughing with thoughts like:

"I wish they'd invent a firework that shot out of the earth's atmosphere and exploded when it reached another planet."

and

"They should invent a firework that shoots fish out of it." (Gross!)

Oh, another funny moment was when Brian's sparkler broke and was shooting out sparks at surrounding bi-standers. We yelled at him to drop it, which he did, but couldn't stomp it out because he had no shoes on. Good times. (Eventually someone else stomped it out.)

Other weekend highlights

* For now, I remain the favorite aunt of my niece Samantha! (Sorry, Katherine.) We'll see how long this lasts. I've learned the hard way that nieces and nephews can be fickle. For now though, I'm loving it. She was attached to my hip most of the day Saturday.
* I went to two family bbqs on Saturday.
* Did some other stuff that's noyb, no offense.
* Was accused of being a cougar by someone who's trying to turn me into one (what's an acceptable age difference for dating again? ha ha)!
* Had another bbq on Sunday with my favorite Arab family.
* Saw a lot of fireflies.
* Watched my dad light sparklers with a blow torch.

So, that was my weekend, for the most part. Ok, this isn't my best post, I'll admit. But at least I got rid of that flag/eagle picture, right? Oops, what I meant to say was,

USA! USA! USA!

Wednesday Thoughts

When I was in high school, I was in a group called HOPE, which stands for Helping Our Planet's Environment. We had t-shirts that said "I think that I shall never see a poem lovely as a tree," which is from the poem "Trees" by Alfred Joyce Kilmer. In honor of both earth day and National Poetry Month, here's the whole poem:

Trees
I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree.
A tree whose hungry mouth is prest
Against the earth's sweet flowing breast;
A tree that looks at God all day,
And lifts her leafy arms to pray;
A tree that may in summer wear
A nest of robins in her hair;
Upon whose bosom snow has lain;
Who intimately lives with rain.
Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.

I don't remember all we did in that group (I think I joined it for mostly social reasons). I know we planted some trees and talked about the environment. We recycled and probably judged people who didn't recycle. We talked about reusing paper and most likely shook our heads in disgust when others didn't use both sides of the paper. Without a doubt, we made a difference.

Now, all these years later I wonder what I'm doing for the environment. My efforts are about the same: Recycling, judging people who don't recycle, refraining from littering, shaking my fist (from the privacy of my car) when I see others litter, and pretty much just hoping for the best as far as the earth is concerned.

But today since it's Earth Day, I thought it would be nice to do something for the earth. The only problem is, I can't decide what to do. I tried calculating my carbon footprint, but it was really a lot more work than I'd anticipated. Another option is to join my company's commuter challenge, but that doesn't start until May and I want to do something today (besides simply joining). The third thing I came up with is to recycle my pop bottles after work but that's kind of self serving because of the $ refund.

In my brainstorming, I came across this fun website with ideas that I'm pretty sure are geared towards children but since I'm an Earth Day beginner, I think it's a good place to start. It even has this great quiz. I got 9/10 right. Top that!!

Anyway, I'm debating between two projects on that website, one is the compost bin (is it ok if I don't decorate it the way they've shown? I'd prefer to decorate mine in a more adult way - like with Spongebob stickers or something) or the eggshell planter (but I'm pretty sure you have to have the hands of a surgeon for that one). If you have any Earth saving tips for me today, I'd love to hear them. Happy Earth Day!

Top of the morning to you!

There's only one holiday that carries the threat of physical harm if you fail to acknowledge it. And today is that day. Look down. Are you wearing green? I hope for your sake that you are. I'd hate to see you get pinched.

When I was a kid, a pinch was the worst thing I could imagine. I still remember walking out the door in the morning to meet the school bus and hearing my mom yell to me, "Happy St. Patrick's Day!" Up to that point, I hadn't realized it was St. Patrick's Day. I knew that meant two things: the milk in the cafeteria would be green, and I'd better be wearing green or I'd end up with a couple of bruises. My backup plan was always that I could lie and say my underwear was green, but that was risky. There was always the chance that someone might need to verify.

Some people try to escape the pinches by saying "my eyes have some green in them." Or, "I'm Scottish." That doesn't work when it comes to the pinching police. You could be from Peru, but if you're not wearing green....watch it.

I guess that I shouldn't be too surprised that a holiday that seems to be centered around getting drunk also involves the threat of physical harm.

This is just a holiday I don't understand. I enjoy it, but I don't understand it. Is there a deeper meaning to it? Is it religious? Is it patriotic? All I know about it, and I suspect all most people know about it, are these things:

1. You must wear green, or there will be violence.

2. It's the only day of the year Leprechauns feel safe coming out.

3. If there's a rainbow, you have a good chance of finding a pot of gold at the end of it.

4. It gives permission to a lot of people to get really drunk on a week day, starting at 9:00AM.

5. If you're Irish, you can demand that people kiss you.

6. Something about 4-leaf clovers and shamrocks...not sure what those are all about.

If you're Irish, or you did a report on Ireland in fourth grade, maybe you could enlighten me.

The science of love

With less than one week to Valentine's Day, maybe you're like me: Valentine-less. I was talking to someone tonight about love, romance, and finding that special someone and he told me about a special he had seen on 20/20. In this program, they were talking with a relationship expert, Helen Fisher (here's a link to the article).

Fisher created a test to determine a person's personality for dating and marriage, which she believes explains a lot about who we are attracted to. She concluded that there are four basic personality types when it comes to dating. Click here to take the quiz and find out your "type."

If you don't feel like reading the article, here are some of the details and a brief description of the four types:

Explorers: risk taking

Builders: calm, traditional

Directors: analytical, tough minded, decisive

Negotiators: emotionally expressive, empathetic

When it comes to dating, her findings concluded that:

Explorers go for Explorers

Builders go for Builders

Directors go for Negotiators

Negotiators go for Directors

I took the test and discovered that I am a negotiator/explorer. And based on the description the quiz results gave of the negotiator, I'd say that's about right. So I guess I'll be spending this week looking for a director? (I'll allow that the search *might* take more than a week.)

I don't know if there is any truth to Helen Fisher's findings, but I figured with Valentine's Day this week, it might be fun to take a love/relationship quiz. (Or maybe it's putting salt in the wound?)

If any of my married friends take the quiz, I'd be curious to know how you match up with your spouse as far as the test results go. Also, if you know any single directors out there, send them my way. It's for science.

Dang Groundhog

Well, the groundhog saw his shadow, and you know what that means. Six more weeks of winter. When did we start trusting a groundhog anyway!? What makes them so trustworthy? Are they ever right? I guess I don't understand the "science" behind it. I think it's time Punxsutawney Phil steps aside and lets another animal start doing some weather predicting. Groundhogs can't be the only animals deeply in tune with weather cycles! Here are some suggestions for replacements.

Nairobi Nick:
Throw a giraffe in the lake. If he swims the long way across, six more weeks of winter. If he swims the shortest distance back, summer's coming early. If he looks really hilarious in the process, summer starts in four weeks.

Magic Hat Mike:
Ask a magician to point at his magic hat and say abracadabra! If a rabbit comes out, six more weeks of winter. If doves come out, summer comes early. If bats come out, Halloween is moved to August.

Mumbai Mary:
Charm a snake. If she comes out of the basket doing the rumba, six more weeks of winter. If she comes out doing the salsa, summer's coming early. If she bites you, suck the venom out.

Des Moines Darcy:
Put your cat in a tree. If the fireman who comes to rescue her charges you for his services, six more weeks of winter. If he asks you on a date, summer is coming early. If he asks you if your friend is single, summer and fall are flip-flopped this year.

If those don't work, here's the most accurate test. Go out on the lake in your boat. Put a worm on a hook and throw it in the water. If a fish eats that worm, it's already summer.