Crushed

I've had many crushes in my life. I pretty much love crushes - they make life more fun. But some crushes are better than others. For your entertainment, here's a condensed glossary:

The bored crush

"I'm not really into him but it's nice to have someone to look forward to seeing."

In a pinch, this guy'll do. Until someone else comes along. This is usually a guy you already know, who you now see in a new light. Why have I never noticed him before?, you wonder. Two weeks later you forget you had a crush on him.

The temporary crush

"I get a contact high when I'm around him but the next day the feelings are gone."

This guy's ok but he doesn't interest you enough for you to really have a crush on him. The day you see him, you feel all giggly but the next day when someone mentions him, you say, "who?"

The "wrong" crush

"He is so wrong for me, but I can't help myself."

This guy either has issues or he dated your friend. Either way, you shouldn't like him. But you can't help yourself.

The bad self esteem crush
"I thought I was cute before but now I think I'm fat."

This guy makes you question your self esteem. Either he's super hot, he flirts with your friends, or he's really successful and popular. Either way, you don't feel very good about yourself with this guy, but there's just something about him... This crush is the worst.

The nerd crush

"He's such a big nerd but there's something about him..."

Whether he's ugly or nerdy, this crush doesn't make any sense to your friends. But you know there's more to him than meets the eye.

The marriage crush

"I just met him but I think he's 'the one.'"

All you can think about with this guy is how cute your kids will be and how happy you'll be when you're married. These crushes last through about 2 conversations.

The happy crush

"Thinking about him just makes my day happy."

I love these crushes. I wish I had more of them.

What are some of your favorite crushes?

Wednesday Thoughts

I'm too tired today to have a lot of thoughts. Well, I guess I have thoughts but I'm just too tired to put them together in an interesting way. So instead of making you read a lot of incoherent babble, I'll share with you a phone conversation I just had with my grandma.

Grandma: Are you going up north this weekend?
Me: Yes, I'm looking forward to it!
Grandma (picturing me on vacation without a man): You need to find a boyfriend.
Me: I know.
Grandma: I guess you're not very aggressive?
Me: Probably not enough.
Grandma: I wasn't either. But you're just so pretty!
Me: Well, thanks!
Grandma: Don't thank me. I can't do anything for you.
Me: (laughing)
Grandma: Your hair just looks so good like that (curly). I'm glad you're wearing it that way more. It looks more professional the other way, but more feminine, curly.
Me: Thanks. Some people seem to like it.
Grandma: Told you so.
.....
Me, changing the subject: So, how are you doing? You sound good!
Grandma: Oh, fair to middlin'.

Happy Wednesday.

Namaste

Well, it happened. Lost ended. And yet, somehow life has gone on. Who knew? The series finale wasn't anything I expected it to be. It didn't answer any of my questions! But after letting it all sink in, I'd have to say that I liked it. And now we can spend the rest of our lives debating the mysteries of Lost.

Now that it's over, I thought it'd be appropriate to do a retrospective and remember my favorite things about Lost. So, without further ado...

Favorite moment: in season one, when Sawyer, Michael, Jin, and Walt are on the raft and Sawyer starts singing "Redemption Song" by Bob Marley. Since redemption is one of the major themes of Lost, this scene has often sprung to mind throughout the series. It was also a nice scene because the four of them were feeling hopeful that they were going to get home (suckers).

Second favorite moment: the end of the episode "Tabula Rasa" when they're all broken and beaten down - emotionally as well as physically- after the plane crash (this is very early in season one) and the song "Wash Away" by Joe Purdy is played. The look on Sawyer's face when Sayid throws him the apple...so sad. Season one was amazing. Here's that scene:



Favorite character: hands down, the Smoke Monster. There are so many unanswered questions about Smokey but I just loved him. My heart raced with excitement whenever we heard that howl and clicky sound that indicated that the arrival of the Smoke Monster was eminent. If Smokey doesn't win an Emmy, there is truly no justice in this world.

Second favorite character: John Locke. I missed him a lot when he died. Smokey in the form of John Locke just wasn't the same. That's a weird sentence.

Hottest character: Sawyer. Duh. But you know I had a thing for Keamy too. Let' s be honest, everyone on the island was hot.

Who I'd like to be stranded on the island with: Probably Jack. I couldn't stand him for the first few seasons ("I didn't choose to be your leader! You made me your leader!" Ugh. What a martyr.) but he was awesome this season. John and Desmond would be the runners up. I'm talking about pure survival and good company here, people - get your minds out of the gutter!

Most shocking moment: When Libby and Ana Lucia were killed. My mind was blown.

Favorite episode: "The Constant." "If anything goes wrong, Desmond Hume will be my constant." The reason this episode is my favorite is because of the ending. Desmond and Penny's phone call was one of my favorite moments ever on t.v. Here's a link (click). It's impossible for me to watch this scene without getting choked up.

Most enigmatic character: This is a tough one. Either Jacob or Ben. What do you think?

Anyway, I think that's enough. I could go on and on but I'll leave it at those categories. Who are your nominees? And what did you think of the series finale?

Namaste.

What I'm listening to

Music is a huge part of my life. I want to blog about it more often than I do, but I usually only end up blogging about it when I'm particularly confused by something I like, like that Justin Beiber song. It's usually at that point that I feel like I need to unburden myself by confessing it to you all.

But I thought, why not occasionally share some of the songs I'm enjoying that I'm not embarrassed by? I'm not sure how often I'll do this but here's my first "what I'm listening to" post. These are in no ways my favorite songs. These are just some songs I like and am listening to a lot right now. If you want to hear any of them, click on the name of the song and it will take you to a youtube video of it.

Be My Lover - Alice Cooper - This song rocks, no two ways about it. Plus, you gotta love a Detroit shout out, right? I know a local band that plays this song slightly better than Alice Cooper, but don't tell him that. And of course, I can't mention Alice Cooper without also referencing Wayne's World. Isn't Milwaukee an Indian word?

Ocean Man - Ween - this is a fun song that cheers me up when I listen to it.

Kickstart My Heart - Motley Crue - This song brings me back to my early teens when I had a penchant for those embarrassing hair bands (I still love them). It's a great work out song. Don't be ashamed.

Denise - Fountains of Wayne - This is a great, upbeat song. The downside is that it has some really stupid rhymes like:

I know this girl named Denise/she makes me weak in the knees/she drives a lavender Lexis/she lives in Queens but her dad lives in Texas.

Dumb, yes. As dumb as Summer Girls by LFO? No. Give it a quick listen - you might like it.

The Pasture (Frostiana) - "One of these things is not like the other..." This song is the odd man out on this list. It's such a beautiful and peaceful song, based on the poem "The Pasture" by Robert Frost. My favorite version is the one sung by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir but I couldn't find a video of that so here's another group. They performed it beautifully too.

Beat the Horse - Pomplamoose - Pomplamoose is a super fun youtube group. They sing their own versions of popular songs. This is one of my favorites of theirs.

So, that's what I'm listening to. This post probably isn't going to get any comments, but that's ok. I thought it'd be fun to share music with you guys and I'd love to hear what you're listening to right now as well.

And if you want to mock fun of me for listening to Motley Crue, now's your chance.

Friday Thoughts

No, I haven't just decided to name every post "----day Thoughts." But I'm in the mood today to do a Wednesday Thoughts like post so I thought the title fit. Ready for some random thoughts? Here we go!

My taste in music is constantly making me question who I am. I feel like I know who I am and what about then, wham! I like a song sung by a 16 year old baby faced man-child (and by man-child I mean child). Yeah, I'm talking about The Biebs. AKA, Justin Bieber. I'm not proud of this. In fact, I'm only listening to super hip music today to cleanse my palette. Cleanse it so I can listen to that Justin Bieber song again. Who am I kidding?

I'm getting together with some friends tonight for karaoke. Do you guys like karaoke? What do you like about it? I can not do karaoke. I had a really bad experience with it once - an experience that almost broke me. Let's just say it involved a group date and a Dixie Chick song. It's become one of my most horrifying memories. What are you supposed to do during those music breaks? Dance? Gyrate? It's too much. But it's sure fun to watch...

Don't you hate when someone doesn't get your sense of humor? I'm training someone at work this week and he was telling me yesterday that he couldn't sleep well the night before. He said that the shorter nights make it harder for him to sleep so he tried wearing one of those satin sleep masks but it irritated him. I suggested he wear a pirate eye patch on each eye instead; that that'd probably keep the light out more. He didn't get it. I had to awkwardly say, "I'm kidding."

And lastly, it's season finale season right now. I have mixed emotions about it. I'll miss my shows but it will be nice to reclaim my life so I think I'm ok with it. I'm pretty sad about Lost ending though and nervous that the series finale won't be everything I need it to be. On top of that, I'll miss talking about Lost, which is half the fun of the show. Just the other day, my coworker Ann asked me a question about Lost (she has only seen the first season) and in response to her question, my answer was: "that was because of the split in the time space continuum." What other show requires that kind of explanation? Oh Lost, I'll miss you.

Happy Friday!

Wednesday Thoughts

Is it ok to go to a movie on a first date? I know a lot of people think it's not but I have to say that I disagree. But I do think that either before or after the movie, you should do something that gives you the chance to talk.

Sometimes I think the dinner and a movie date gets a bad rap. Personally, I like it. I love going to the movies and if someone else is paying - bonus. Plus, you get to sit close to the person and get clues about how they feel about you during the movie. Is he leaning close to you or away from you? Is he protecting you during the scary scenes? Wait, did he just laugh at that sexist joke? Did he ask, "wait, who's that guy?" more than three times? These are all very important things to know.

And let's be honest, if you're not feeling into the person you're on the date with, at least you can enjoy an hour and half of not talking with them.

If you're not sure how to behave on a movie date, check out this hilarious web page I stumbled upon while looking for an image for this post.

Anyway, I recently had a discussion about this with a guy friend. He thinks movie dates are definitely not for the first date. What do you think? And more importantly I guess, what does make a good first date?

I've been on a few good first dates (and some really bad ones - but those are stories for another day) - the zoo, putt putt, dinner, the usual. On one first date, we went for a long drive in the country then went out to eat. This one made me a little anxious because I didn't know the guy that well and in the back of my mind I sort of wondered if he was driving me out to the country so he could murder me and hide my body. But he didn't, so I'd say it was a good date idea. Wait, that makes it sound like I judge if a date is good by whether or not I was murdered. I like to think my expectations are slightly higher than that. I judge it based on whether or not punches were thrown.

Moving on the other Wednesday Thoughts. Remember the post I did titled "He Thinks You're Cute"? Well, the guys over at the Singles Ward blog wrote a post about it with their insights on the topic. It's pretty interesting and gives a guys point of view! Check it out here (link) if you'd like.

Oh, and if you're wondering, I haven't seen Pierce yet. (Sigh.) But I'll keep you updated!

Happy Wednesday.

Above It

Darn this pride of mine! Remember when I told you a little while back about that Pierce Brosnan movie that was going to be filmed next door to my office building sometime in May? Well, sometime in May has arrived but I'm ruining every chance I get to see Pierce because of my stubborn refusal to gawk!

For some foolish reason, I think I'm above gawking. Today at the end of the work day, we got notification that the film crew was going to be setting up a fake telephone booth in our driveway. My first thought was:

Ohmygosh, that's right by the bike rack - where my bike is. I might see Pierce! Don't blow this! Act cool.

So I did just that. I walked out, put my bike helmet on and rode off, not craning my neck in the slightest to catch a glimpse of Pierce. Cool as a cucumber. It required a lot of effort, I can't lie. And what did I gain? Nothing!

As I rode by the set, I saw a bunch of bystanders taking pictures of the set and the cast with their cell phones and I thought, "pf! They are so uncool but they don't even know it." But another part of me was screaming, "pull your bike over and take a picture! You are not above this and you know it!"

As I was riding home, I realized I have worked or lived within two blocks of where three major movies have been filmed in the past two years - but have I gawked at all? No. Do I regret not gawking? Yes! Last winter, I even walked practically through a scene but didn't look to see who was in it. Later I found out it might have been Andy from the office. Andy! And I didn't look! What a fool!

One of my older coworkers has Pierce fever right now. She's sort of a free spirit and of foreign descent. She keeps telling us that she's going to kiss Pierce if she sees him. We keep telling her not to, but she's a woman with a mission. As I said bye to her today, she said, "if I kiss Pierce, I will call you." I said, "don't bother, I'm sure I'll hear about it on the news."

I had no idea last night that my biggest problem today would be trying to get Pierce Brosnan to think I'm cool. Life's full of surprises.

Flip Flopping

It's that time of year again. Time to shed the shoes and socks and slip on the sandals... or sandal's more controversial cousin: the flip flop.

Emotions run high when it comes to flip flops. Some people hate them because of that sound they make - you know that sound. Others swear by them and make them their summer staple.

Personally, I like flip flops. I know they annoy some people so at times I feel self conscious, but mostly I don't. I mean, I use a Ped Egg, my toenails are painted, my flip flops are cute, and my feet smell like flowers. I don't see the problem.

What do you think? Let's break it down.

Cons:
That flip flop sound when someone's walking down the hall.
Foot nudity and all that goes along with that (some people have gross feet, not to mention the smell).
The tan line. It's not good.

Pros:
They're convenient - no straps or laces, just slip 'em on and go.
They're inexpensive so you can have a lot of different pairs.
You can show off your cute pedicure.

While you're thinking about it, here's a video for your viewing pleasure. Don't let this sway you since none of you (I hope) are anything like this guy. Oh, and I'm making a poll to make it easier for you to weigh in.

Wednesday Thoughts

I know I usually focus on single people issues in this blog - but today I have something for both the single and the paired off. In fact, I have two things for the paired off (you guys put up with a lot of single talk, so I owe you). So without further ado,

The Single Talk
Is it possible to cross over from friendship into a dating relationship? This is an age old question, of course. The main thing people are quick to point out is the possibility of ruining the friendship, of course. But I think the biggest problem is reading the signals (friendship shmendship). Years ago I had a huge crush on a guy friend of mine and assumed he did not feel the same way. I was wrong, but only found out when it was too late. Neither of us knew the other felt the same way! What a waste. So that's my question this week - anyone have any experience with this? I've talked with friends about this over the years but I don't think I've ever talked about it in this forum before.

The other question that goes along with this is: how do you avoid getting in the friend zone in the first place? I've heard a few theories on this over the years but thought I'd ask what you guys think. I need to know so that the next time I meet a cool guy I don't ruin things by giving him a friendship bracelet prematurely.

And now some stuff for the couples! I have two products to share with you this week. And I should warn you, they're both disturbing, but for different reasons.

Product #1
Cuddle Spray - This one is pretty sneaky. Think your boyfriend/husband isn't cuddly enough? Spray them with some cuddle spray and let the spooning begin! This scientific formula makes a man more like a woman, which I guess makes them want to cuddle more (I'm a little fuzzy on the science). Click here for more info. Would you let your man know you were using this on him? Or would you trick him? This product upsets me a little bit, but not as much as the one I'm about to share...


Product #2
The Better Marriage Blanket - To introduce this product, I'll start with the first line in its commercial:

"It's the problem in the marriage bed that no one likes to talk about. Maybe that's why they call it 'silent but deadly.'"

Oh boy. I'm already starting to regret bringing this one up. I like to think my blog is above this. That having been said, I felt that I just had to share this amazing product with you guys. But because I refuse to say the F word in this blog (the other F word), I'm going to let the commercial do the talking:



If you were getting married, which would you rather receive as a wedding gift?

Happy Wednesday!

PS - There's something wrong with Blogger today and the "comment" button keeps disappearing. Check back later (or refresh a few times) and it should be back!

Elizabethisms

This blog has been a real downer lately - first I go on and on about my surgery then I post about how I couldn't sleep because I was cold and sick. It's time to pick things up a bit around here.

I thought I'd share with you today some "Elizabethisms" - these are terms I often use that require a little explanation:

Kitten whispering
Years ago I met someone who was constantly whispering her conversations with everyone except, it seemed to me, me. I didn't know her very well yet so I assumed she was talking about something really scandalous and interesting with everyone else and only talking about boring things with me. I wondered about her life, thinking it must be very glamorous and fascinating. Why else would she be whispering in a group setting with only a select few? Then one day I overheard part of a whispered conversation she was having with someone sitting near me. I couldn't believe my ears - she was whispering about her new kitten! I was both disappointed and relieved. I wasn't being left out of anything interesting at all. Ever since then, when someone is acting super secretive about something anticlimactic, I call it kitten whispering.

The warm maker
The warm maker is the warmest blanket I own. On cold winter (or May) nights, I put it directly over me, then pull my sheet and lesser blankets on top of it. Instant warmth. I know what you're thinking, "aren't all blankets warm?" Not as warm as the warm maker.

Old blue
Old blue is old tattered night shirt I never let anyone see. I should have thrown this night shirt away years ago. It is about as ratty looking as it can get. It's about two sizes too big for me, the seams are all ripped (either all the way or most of the way) and it's a very faded blue. It's by far the most embarrassing article of clothing I own (not including my collection of dickies in every color). I have gotten several new night shirts over the years but for some reason haven't thrown Old Blue away. I very rarely wear it - I'm sort of afraid I'll choke to death in my sleep on the ripped seams. But every now and then when I'm really down or sick or something, I'll bust it out. I can't believe I just admitted this...I feel so exposed.

Anyway, those are three of my Elizabethisms. What are some terms you've made up?

Sleepover memories

When I was a young teenager, my friend Kristin and I used to have sleepovers almost every weekend. I have many fond memories of these sleepovers (and one not-so-fond memory - click here for that story as well as an awesome picture of us). A typical sleepover was made up of these components:

60% talking about boys (and that includes NKOTB)

20% renting movies

5% doing makeovers

5% buying candy/treats

10% annoying other people.

A few months ago Kristin was in town for a visit and we were reminiscing about all the crazy things we did back in that time. We concluded that 1) we were pretty obnoxious, 2) we thought we were really funny back then, and 3) we actually were pretty funny.

One time on summer vacation, Kristin spent the night on a Sunday night. We weren't supposed to go the store on Sundays for religious reasons but we snuck down anyway and hid the candy in the bushes until that night. Late that night when we snuck outside to grab our loot, it was covered with ants. We learned a valuable lesson that night - that we should have hid the candy under our shirts and smuggled it inside as soon as we got home from the store.

Another time we begged Kristin's older brother to drive us to our Sunday School teacher's house so we could fork their yard (stick tons of plastic forks in it). He said no so we waited till night fall and walked all the way there to do it. We were determined. It turned out great, by the way.

Then there was the time we thought we'd make orange julius but read the recipe wrong. Instead of putting two table spoons of sugar in it, we put two cups in. When it came time to drink it, we could tell something was wrong by the consistency but we made everyone taste it to help us figure it out. I vividly remember every one's scrunched up faces as the took a sip of pure orange sugar.

All these memories came back to me recently because for the first time in almost 20 years, I watched the movie "UHF" starring Weird Al a couple nights ago. Kristin and I rented UHF and Can't Buy Me Love almost every weekend back in the day for our sleepovers. We quoted from UHF all the time.

I was worried that the movie wouldn't be funny after all these years, but I shouldn't have been scared. It was hilarious. Here's a link to a clip to prove it.

What were some of your favorite movies when you were a teenager? What were your favorite things to do at a sleepover? I'm at home resting after my surgery (which went fine - I ended up not getting the gas so I didn't say anything embarrassing) so your stories will keep me entertained!

No pressure. I just won't heal well if you don't share.

Pensamientos del miercoles

I have to have oral surgery tomorrow and I'm scared out of my mind. I should have asked the surgeon if he'd prescribe me a sedative for the week leading up to the surgery.

I know what you're thinking: "stop being so freaking over dramatic!" And guess what? I agree with you (although you could have said it a little nicer). I am being over dramatic. But in this case I just can't get past my fear of these three things:

1. The pain. Oh, the pain!
2. Meeting my "future husband" in the waiting room (that's a 30 Rock reference in case you don't watch it).

3. The surgery...and more specifically the anesthesia.

The doctor said I have two options, if I recall correctly: local anesthesia and gas (nitrous oxide). From the way he was talking, it was obvious he thought gas was the better option, promising me it would make the surgery a "pleasant memory." Never having experienced nitrous oxide before, I asked him "do people usually say embarrassing things on it?" He answered me bluntly, "yes."

Now I'm almost as nervous about that as I am the pain. What might I say that's so embarrassing, you ask? Well, here's a hint: the surgeon is really attractive. If I were to ever find out the words "too bad you're married" or "do you have a single brother?" passed my lips, I would be mortified.

Plus, one time after I had surgery and was coming out of anesthesia a nurse told me, "you said some pretty funny things in there." I just said, "oh," not wanting to know what I had said and vowing to never show my face in that hospital again.

In other Wednesday Thoughts, today's Cinco de Mayo! Are you doing anything fun? Five points to whoever can tell me what Cinco de Mayo actually celebrates (I'm actually not sure, so I'd have to consult wikipedia to tell you if your answer is right or wrong). Extra points given to creative answers.

Anyway, happy Wednesday and feliz Cinco de Mayo, amigos. Eat a taco for me! And wish me luck!

Pwned

May I vent a little? Get ready for the most curmudgeonly post you've ever heard from me. This is the post where I show my true age (which is 80).

I think it's time for certain phrases and slang to be retired. I've recently reached my limit with the following:

FTW (for the win!) Enough already. Does anyone really feel comfortable using this? I question this whenever I see it at the end of a Facebook status update - is anyone using it correctly? I'm not saying I know how to use it, I just don't get it. I really don't get it.

pwned - Annoying. Mildly amusing at first. Lame now.

"just sayin'" - I know you're just sayin.' That's what sayin' is. I reached my limit with this one this morning. I can't take it anymore. For awhile there it was kind of funny, cute, whatever. But it's use as "no offense" is taking over Facebook status updates.

"Some people don't know how to drive! Just sayin.'"
"Certain ex-boyfriends need to get a life! Just sayin!'"
"I love meatballs! Just sayin!'"

Enough. I know you're just sayin' when I hear you sayin.'

I was kind of worried people would be offended by this post, but you really can't be because I'm just sayin.'

What are you tired of?

(It's possible I have a "case of the Mondays"...)