Elizabeth Downie: Wednesday Thoughts

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Wednesday Thoughts

A few weeks ago I had a bad dream that prompted me to join a dating website the following morning. I joined on a whim and realized halfway through the process that in order to read messages people sent you, you had to pay. I waffled a bit over this decision and several weeks later, I still haven't decided. I've received emails telling me I have messages waiting but I can't bring myself to pay to read them yet. It's not like it's a ton of money - it's really not. It's just that years and years ago I joined another dating website - a free one - and I wouldn't be willing to pay for the majority of the messages I received on that website.

In fact, out of curiosity, I logged onto that old website recently to see if there was anything interesting. I found this series of emails that demonstrated exactly why I'm unsure about paying for messages. All four of these came in less than ten minutes. Why this guy thought I was online, I have no idea. I don't feel like translating these but if you speak Spanish you will enjoy them:

1:47 hola hermana como estas ,sabe me gustaría saber de usted y tener tu correo para estarnos comunicándonos
1:50 estas ahi?
1:52 sabe hermana quiero una esposa eterna ? seras tu.
1:54 me gustaría hermana conocer lo que hay en tu corazón y tu mente?

Oh brother. I don't know though - maybe on a website where you have to pay, the messages would be less weird? What do you think? No offense to the above "hermano" who's just trying to find "una esposa eterna."

Anyway. I'm thinking about doing a summer movie series with some friends. What are some fun movies that men and women both like, and that are fun and summer-y? I mean, besides the Sandlot which is clearly the best option. Any other ideas? Karate Kid? What About Bob? I'd love your input!

In other thoughts, I kind of can't believe it but the fireflies are already out! I was on a run last night (grumble grumble grumble) and unexpectedly saw one! (I gasped!) Then another and another. I saw several more before I got home. Does that mean summer has officially begun?

And lastly I want to share with you a funny picture I saw online earlier. Sadly, I can kind of relate to this. Can you?

Happy Wednesday.

6 comments:

Jesse Davis said...: You most definitely need to watch Troll 2.; May 30, 2012 at 12:28 PM
Liz Hughes said...: I have some very strong feelings about online dating...
Anyway, movies I love... Well you've seen my collection, any of those.; May 30, 2012 at 4:34 PM
Katherine said...: Oooh, that picture's great! I can relate, too.

I'm not a fan of online dating, but then I'm not a fan of real-life dating, either, so maybe I'm not one to go to for advice... Too many uncertainties!!!! I've got enough of that going on.

And YAY fireflies!!!; May 30, 2012 at 4:50 PM
D said...: Goonies and Tremors. :) yay fireflies!! I miss them. I went on a date with a boy at byu who after one convo thought we might have known each other in the pre-existence. That got my weirdo meter up and I'm afraid I wasnt very nice to him on the one date we went on. He just wouldn't take a hint though....so I had to be less subtle. Blech... Online dating sounds like that...; June 2, 2012 at 10:01 AM
Vaughn said...: I dated a girl once who after we broke up told people I was gay..... so not dating isn't so bad either; June 3, 2012 at 2:40 AM
Liz Hughes said...: Why are those messages in Spanish? Is it a Spanish dating site? And why won't you translate them? I'm dying to know what creepy things he said, and I'm too lazy to go to google translate.
Paying for online dating sort of makes me feel like a prostitute. Without any of the things prostitutes do or say.; December 26, 2012 at 6:00 PM

Quotes that make me laugh

"What is the point in having a glowing orb section if you're going to put the glowing orbs with the monkey paws!?" - Nandor

"The mashed potatoes aren't as buttery as usual, mom. Did we go poor?" - Bobby Hill

Rose: Last year the Woman of the Year in St. Olaf saved all the books from the library fire! She grabbed two books in one and and one in the other."
Dorothy: Your library only has three books? What happens when someone reads them all?
Rose: I guess we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
- The Golden Girls

"A penny!? Worthless! It's the garbage of money!" - Barry, The Goldbergs

Danny: You wanna live in a ninth floor walk-up!? What happens if there's a fire?
Mindy: Danny, you know my plan in an emergency is just to count to ten and wait for death's embrace! - The Mindy Project

Chris: Leslie, I'm sorry. Anne didn't just go to Ann Arbor to visit her family. She went to sign a lease on our new home.
Leslie: Ann Arbor sounds disgusting!
Chris: She already has family there, and I have a new job lined up at the University of Michigan. Go Blue! It's a good town, and it's a great place to raise a family.
Leslie: What is so great about it!? There's no JJ's Diner there, there's no Welcome to Pawnee sign! I mean, the stupid state is split up into two pieces! It's ridiculous!
- Parks and Rec

Tom: "Now, I know high-end, internet only magazine isn't really your scene, so Donna and I wrote up some cocktail banter and some conversation snippets for you to practice so you can fit in."
Ron: (Reading) "Annabel, could I be more jelz of your low-lights right now, I mean O.M. squee, talk about bangs envy."
Donna: "Oof, you got a long way to go, Swanson. Let's go again, from the top."
Ron: "I regret everything."
- Parks and Rec

"Hello, young man, do you carry Fat Steps Cankle Wranglers? They're for the problematic foot." - Mindy, The Mindy Project

"No one tells you how hard it is to be a parent!" - Frankie
"That's because if they did, no one would do it. It's called punishing-it forward." - Mike
- The Middle

Listen to me. NOBODY on the computer is having as good of a time as you think they are." - Mike, The Middle

"It took me all day, but I got the ten signatures I needed! I'm running for student body president!" - George Michael, Arrested Development

"Life is precious. And if I die, I want my... son... to know the dealio. The dealio of life." - Michael Scott, The Office

"Somebody threw a snow-cone at my windshield today. I thought I hit a rainbow. It was terrifying." - Teddy, Bob's Burgers

"Stop calling me the Prince of Darkness. That's how rumors get started." - Monk

"I'm giving you an all tomato, meaning you give me the whole tomato or else." - Troy, Community

Tracy, talking about Weird Al: Don't you understand? He's going to parady you again! That's what he does! That's all he does! You can't stop him!
Jenna: Unless I write a song that can't be parodied.
Tracy: Impossible. What do think Phil Collins was trying to do with Sussudio!?
-30 Rock

"20 year old girls! They think I'm awesome! Look at them! They don't know what Saved By the Bell is and they've never felt pain!!" - Nick, New Girl

"Due to my campaign, the romantic aspect of our relationship is over, and I am totally fine with that. But Ben and I have so much in common! I mean, we're amazing friends! And friendship is better because friends help you move, they drive you to the airport! Boyfriends just.... love you and marry you."
- Leslie, Parks and Rec

Claire: You know that really dangerous intersection?
Phil: Where desire meets jealousy and the result is murder?
Claire: Uhuh. The one where I almost killed you this morning.
Phil: Oh yeah, that was my bad. I got lost in my jams! Dangerous combo: speed walking and Speedwagon. Oh! I wasn't even trying for that!
- Modern Family

Tobias: As you may or may not know, Lindsay and I have hit a bit of a rough patch.
Michael: Really. When did that start?
Tobias: Well, I don't want to blame it on 911, but it certainly didn't help.
-Arrested Development

"I don't want to talk about it Ken! You'll hear all I have to say about Jack Donaghy in my tell-all book, 'Betrayal, COLON, What Really Happened With My Baseball Team, COMMA, Disaster at Knuckle Beach, QUESTION MARK."
- Tracy, 30 Rock

Burt: "You seem real happy to keep pining for her! You pine, pine, pine, but you don't do anything! You just sit there like a log!"
Virginia: "A pine log!"
Burt: "Which is the worst kind of log! Best log? Yule. Best Yule? Brenner. Best Brenner? David. Best David? That's where it starts to get complicated."
- Raising Hope

"Camping sucks! It's super boring. And you can see the stars, which I hate. They're creepy." - April, Parks and Rec

"Andy!! I don't even want to be here! The air is too fresh - it's disgusting. I can't breathe. And there's a brook somewhere that won't stop babbling. SHUT UP!" -April, Parks and Rec

Shawn: "Gus, don't be the ribs that flip over Fred Flintstone's car. I know you're not completely sold on my hit man theory, but I need you to suspend your disbelief and hop onboard the streetcar named Shawnzire."
Gus: "Dude, you know how that metaphor makes me uncomfortable." -Psych

"You had me at meat tornado." - Ron Swanson, Parks and Rec

"So dumb guys go for dumb girls, and smart guys go for dumb girls? What do smart girls get?" - Alex
"Cats, mostly." - Phil -Modern Family

"The parade was awesome. Angela Lansbury was the grand marshall. Good times, she wrote." - Phil, Modern Family

"What?!? I don't have $30,000 laying around! I have it buried very deeply. And I don't want to have to dig past a certain someone to get it." - Dwight, The Office

"When you're a kid, I remember really loving going to bed. There was one time where I actually laughed myself to sleep, 'cause I couldn't believe me luck. - Karl Pilkington

"And so our employee of the month is the late Roger Dusset, who tragically died from complications due to union organizing." - Mr. Burns, The Simpsons

Ron: "I'm hungry."
Leslie: "Ok, don't be such a baby. I cooked you some bacon for a trail snack."
Ron: "I ate it already. I could smell it in your purse before I even parked my car. And now it's gone and I hate everything." - Parks and Rec

Shawn: "Lassy, where did you go? We were totally filming your speech!"
Gus: "And we need you to sign a release for America's Funniest Home Videos." -Psych

"I've been with NBC for a really long time. A really long time. Remember the Cosby Show? I was Rudy." - Conan O'Brien

"A book hasn't caused me this much trouble since Where's Waldo went to that barber pole factory!" - Tracy, 30 Rock

"Can we go to Banana Republic? I have a crush on a mannequin there." - Millhouse, The Simpsons

"I just stopped by to thank you. You've been really supportive of me during my transformation to hideous man-beast." - Harvey, Sabrina the Teenage Witch

In reference to the date being 9/9/9: "I haven't heard that many nein's since I dated that German woman." - Conan O'Brien "

"Sadly, Teamocil has been discontinued. The sense of wellness it created in relationships was merely the first sign of complete pituitary shutdown." - Tobias Funke, Arrested Development

"I am single now. What we have here is the ultimate smackdown between the nard dog and crippling despair, loneliness, and depression. I intend to win." - Andy Bernard, The Office

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Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Wednesday Thoughts

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