Put that in your blog!

I visited my grandma on Friday. She was in desperate need of some granddaughterly help - for one thing, she couldn't figure out how to use her new microwave (or how to open it), and on top of that, she couldn't open her jar of mayonnaise. Needless to say, I left feeling both brilliant and in the best shape of my life ("how did you open that!? I've been working on it all day!").

After amazing my grandma with my skillz, we sat and talked for awhile. She was thrilled that I was wearing my hair curly. She even clapped and cheered when she noticed it. She has a theory that men love curly hair. When she meets a woman (usually a nurse at the hospital) with curly hair, she tells them that her granddaughter has curly hair but that she straightens it. I think it's almost a sin to her. She said the only thing men like better than curly hair is red curly hair. Where she gets this information, I don't know.

Another bit of information she gave me is that she saw something on tv about how men prefer women who are a little curvy. After telling me that, she said, "Put that in your blog!"

I'm almost positive my grandma has never seen my blog before. And it's weird to hear her say the word "blog" like it's the most familiar thing to her. I mean, she's 90 years old and has never owned or used a computer. She knows my blog is something on the internet, and she knows I write in it. Other than that, I'm not sure how she pictures it. But apparently someone leaked it to her that I write about her sometimes. I think she likes it.

I briefly considered doing a post now and then with advice from my grandma about dating, called "Grandma Says." But I think I can summarize most of her tips right here:

Grandma says:

1. Unbutton that top button.

2. Wear your hair curly.

3. Bake brownies and cookies for the guy you're interested in.

4. Invite him over for dinner.

5. Have him spend time with your family.

6. Let him see how good you are with children.

7. If he's attractive and you'd have cute kids, stick with him.

8. Keep in shape so you look good in a wedding dress. (A few years ago, I put on a few pounds and she told me this. I don't make this stuff up!)

So there you have it. If it worked for her, it'll work for you. If you need me, I'll be over here wearing my hair curly and baking brownies.