Friday, June 27, 2008

I'm ready for my close up!

I have never had any real desire to act - in fact, I have a strong aversion to even being video taped. Years ago when Katherine was directing a play and I was helping her with props, I had nightmares about being on stage and forgetting my lines. And I wasn't even in the play! It's just something that I have never wanted to be a part of. Until now.

The buzz around Saline for the past month or so is that Drew Barrymore is directing a film in the Saline area about roller derby girls called "Whip It" and, bonus: she's looking for extras. At work, Justin and Kathy and I have been talking about this a lot lately. Justin's comments were at first focused on making fun of the location: "Saline!? Why Saline?!" Whereas Kathy and I, who live in Saline, have been dreaming about our film debut. We looked up pictures of roller derby girls to get some idea of how we need to look be considered for the film, and found this:
After studying this and other pictures, I have great news: I'm not going to have to change much about my current "look." Alright, so let's see what I already have:

red fishnets - check
sunglasses - check
hardcore hair cut - check
bad attitude - check

Looks like all I need is the actual gear. I used to have roller skates but I don't think they'll fit me anymore, considering I haven't worn them in about twenty years. I think it will be pretty easy to get back to my old level of skill (which was level "awesome").

Ok, I have to be honest....the more I look at the pictures, the more nervous I get. After all, I bruise easily and these girls look really tough.

Can I pull this off? Maybe I should give Drew a call and find out more about my important role as an extra and how much contact I'd have to have with women like the one pictured above. Ellen Page is in the movie though and I'm definitely tougher than her. Well, tougher than her when she was pregnant in Juno anyway. I should probably start working out though, just in case.

Needless to say, I've changed my tune about acting. How can I pass up this opportunity? My game plan is to wander the streets of Saline for the next month until I'm "discovered." I just hope they don't cast me as Ellen's mom or something. But I guess I can't be picky, after all, I'm just starting my career as a Hollywood actress, and you have to start somewhere!

See you on the red carpet!


Dallan said...

I love it. That first picture of the derby chick is fantastic, as is your checklist. "Bad attitude" - ha!

Priscilla, Chris and four miniatures said...

Too funny. But I just have to say that I can totally envision you as one of them, though you may have to do something different with your hair! And anyway, you're definitely tougher than Drew Barrymore, is she even going to be in the film??

Najah said...

This is ridiculous. I am sorry to have to be the voice of reason here, but "Hard Core Haircut"?! Is that what you call Repunzel length blond locks these days? "Bad Attitude"?! Right, I would sooner think Doris Day could stand in for Mr. T! I can't let you do this!

Elizabeth Downie said...

Oh Najah, you crack me up. Don't worry, I didn't mean it. I know I'm not tough (sob!). But I insist you take back the part about Doris Day! ;) Thanks for looking out for me.

Katherine said...

Well, I would definitely say that you had the bad attitude down, and if we took your headshot when you first got up in the morning, I think that you could definitely pass off as having "hard core hair..." Guess I'd better start roller skating around town so I can beat you at getting discovered...EAT MY ROLLER SKATE DUST!

Sarah I. Dareya (My Roller Derby Name) said...

Ok, in order to do this (and yes, I really want to do this!), I'm going to need a makeover to undo my years of trying (occasionally with some success) to be feminine and girly! Plus, maybe now I won't miss living in LA quite so much when we've got great Hollywood action right here. :)