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Sunday, January 24, 2010

On edge

I know I've already blogged about "the un-friending" on facebook. I've confessed that I have un-friended people who I've had little to no contact with in years, or who seriously annoy me (ok, I didn't say that part, but I've done it for that reason too). But I've never un-friended any of you, so no need to fret. I'm not in any way threatening you or warning you to be on your best behavior. Unlike a facebook friend of mine who I will call Blake.

Lately Blake has decided to start warning us, his FB friends, that it's un-friending time. About a week ago, he announced it in his status update. He got a bunch of comments saying things like, "I'm so glad I made the cut!" And begging, "Please don't delete me!"

Then yesterday I logged on and saw he had updated his status to say that he had decided to only have 150 FB friends and if we were reading his status, it meant we made the cut. I found myself feeling really relieved that I'd made it. Why!? This is a guy who I don't know very well, who is about ten years younger than me and with whom I've had increasingly less and less contact since meeting last summer. He's a good guy and I like him but I haven't been very aware of him until I found out I might not be working hard enough to deserve to stay on his friend list.

His status update left me with a handful of questions:

1) Why did I make the cut?
2) Why do I feel so relieved?
3) What do I have to do to make sure I don't get cut in the future?"
and lastly,
4) Why do I care?

Ok, I know those questions sound really dramatic (except the last one) but they weren't as dramatic as they sound. I only wept for joy for 20, maybe 30 minutes once I found out I'd made it.

But I was pretty intrigued... This guy has on on our toes. That particular status update got a ton of comments from friends thanking Blake for not un-friending them. I can't help but wonder if he's doing some kind of sociological experiment or playing psychological mind games on us. He's trying to let us know that his Facebook friendship is not something we should take for granted.

I've already sent him a dozen roses and a box of chocolates by way of thanking him for keeping me on his list.

His plan is working.

14 comments:

Emily said...

How many friends did he have to start out with?

He is probably still hot for your body and hoping you will come around.

Vaughn said...

he probably keeps you as a friend so that he can pine over that sweet picture that will one day make you and Katherine Millions...oh wait that is me.... I would delete him just to see if he noticed. Story time, i did that and she totally re added me as a friend and sent me an email....

Christi said...

Sorry, but I'm not buying that you don't know why you made the cut ;)
That is pretty funny though.

Elizabeth Downie said...

I shouldn't comment on what you're implying, but I'd be surprised if I was kept for that reason after all this time. haha

Sara said...

I'm not gonna lie. That whole public announcement might annoy me enough to unfriend him and announce it publicly as my status update. A preemptive strike. He'd have to work to get me to accept him as a friend again. hahaha

Sarah said...

This blog post cracks me up!! Well done! Sara, I totally agree with you about the preemptive strike! :)

Melanie said...

I think that facebook drama is unnecessary. If you don't think enough people comment on your status/photo or wished you a happy birthday, you should get off facebook and make some real friends.

People unfriend me all the time and I don't know what friends I'm losing, so I'm sure we weren't "really" friends to begin with...

I never unfriend people because I don't really see the point. It's not like I'm putting anything on facebook that is super private information. If somehow we're friends on facebook, then you can see that I like Harry Potter or I carved a pumpkin. Not really life shattering info.

Can you blog about people talking on their phones in the bathroom?

Elizabeth Downie said...

I don't know Melanie, my life was pretty shattered when I saw that picture of you with that pumpkin. I wish you had warned me beforehand so I could have been more prepared for it. ;)

Actually, I think Jessica blogged about people talking on the phone in the bathroom at one point! Yep, she did (I just looked it up):

http://jessicaannallen.blogspot.com/2009/12/are-public-bathrooms-private.html

Anonymous said...

If you un-friend me then I won’t see you again? Or are you still in my list but I will no longer receive you status updates?

I would be sad if that was to happen. After all, even though I don’t comment much I enjoy seen your updates and pictures and how great you look 

Now to another topic, 10 years younger; is that cougar territory? Age and dating is always interesting. I agree with Emily he is probably hot for you and is easy to see why.

Katherine said...

I also agree with Sara, that you should have at least warned him that you were going to un-friend him for being such a butthead. (Yeah, I called him that!) Will you send ME a dozen roses and a box of chocolates if I keep you on my friend list?!

Mark Bowman said...

Someone once explained the acceptable age difference rule as formula:

Girl's Age >= Guy's Age/2 + 7

So a 30 year old guy could date a 15+7 = 22 year old woman, but no younger.

But that is when the man is older than the woman. I'll bet there's a different formula for a socially acceptable age difference when the woman is older.

Over half my FB friends are significantly younger than me, but I think that's more than a factor of who uses the website than who I actually know.

In general, I need to have in person contact with someone to maintaining a "virtual" relationship with them, whether it's on FB or an entry in my phone list. Exceptions would be relatives in another country, or high school friends that are still in prison.

Anonymous said...

I'd like to know if Mark's High School friends got the "go to jail" card before or after High School. The word "still" seemed to imply that they never made it past high school - but went directly to jail.
I suppose that makes for an easy High School reunion - just gather everyone up in cell block d for party favors and yearbook pics.

Elisabeth

Robert said...

Does it mean anything if we are not yet Facebook friends? Am I less of a friend? lol. I have a friend I met who took down her Facebook for a couple days and then reappeared with the "if you are reading this, you made the cut". She still had some 500+ friends!! I'm guessing your friend must have been part of the same sociology experiment. :)

The Boob Nazi said...

You should delete him. ha